Forbidden

For weeks I had been secretly masturbating to videos of well-endowed men. Then I saw him come out of the water and knew it: that boy was what I needed.

Santiago walked into the classroom that Monday in that fitted shirt and with a deep voice that raised goosebumps on my skin from the first word he spoke.

Natalia had her legs spread on the table and the doctor was pretending to apply cream. I watched from the corner, motionless, not wanting him to stop.

I pedaled to the river with my blood already hot, knowing what I was going to do when no one could see me. That afternoon, at last, fantasy would become real.

Valeria was 26 when we went on vacation together. I’d spent days unable to stop looking at her, and neither of us knew what was about to happen.

I had endured months of her games, but that night the jokes finally ended. What came after had no name for either of us.

I’d been in the swinger world as a single guy for months until I was summoned to an apartment and recognized my best friend’s grandmother serving me whiskey.

I brought wine to his room at eleven at night under the pretense that I couldn’t sleep. We both knew it was a lie, but neither of us said it out loud.

I slipped in quietly and found him by the window, absorbed in what was happening across the street. My youngest son was no longer a boy, and I saw everything.

Her husband sent reminders, never messages for her. The night watchman looked at her as if she were real. One night was enough to change everything.

Diego sent me affectionate messages while I was, inside that jacuzzi, feeling Sergio’s hands on my waist and pushing my ass back against him.

Alone in the house for the first time in months, I turned on the screen with the vague intention of killing time. No one could imagine what I was about to discover about myself.

When the weight of his body sank the mattress behind my back, I knew it wasn’t my boyfriend. And I knew I wasn’t going to do anything to stop him.

I had been watching her in silence for years, telling myself it was only an obsession that would pass. That morning, with what I had recorded in my hand, I knew everything was about to change.

Three months without seeing each other, and the moment she stepped off the plane I knew something was going to happen. What I didn’t count on was witnesses on the beach that night.

They had been friends for years. All coupled, all jealous, convinced it was just another dinner. Then Daniela brought out the cards.

When Rafael ordered me to take off my blouse, the other two men in the room didn’t move. No one protested. No one looked away. That was what he wanted me to understand.

She was my best friend’s girlfriend, and she knew exactly what effect she had on me. Every skirt, every neckline was a message meant only for me.

I’d spent months ignoring his looks in the mirror. That night I was left alone in the rain, and he was the only one who showed up.