Gay

He arrives, turns me around, and pulls down my pants. Without saying a word. That’s how it began, and that’s how it’s worked ever since.

While the others kept drinking, I already had Andrés cornered in the alley. I'd spent hours unable to take my eyes off him.

The girls had left, the room was silent, and Rodrigo made a joke that we both knew wasn’t really a joke.

There was something about the way he looked at me from the platform. It wasn’t just any look. I knew that if I went with him, I’d never be the same.

They were an uncle and his nephew, two gym beasts who had been watching me for weeks. That Sunday, something in the air changed forever.

He asked me for a light, and when I held out my lighter, his eyes dazzled me. Five minutes later, we were heading to his apartment, and I still had no idea what I’d gotten myself into.

I’d been keeping that curiosity to myself for years. In the dark, with him a meter away, I felt that if I didn’t ask then, I never would.

We’d been together in front of the screen for months, each on his side. The afternoon Marcos reached out to me changed everything between us forever.

We were a married couple used to sharing everything. When Marcos arrived from tour with that same old smile, we knew dinner would have to wait.

He was the boss’s son: proper, shy, well-mannered. I never imagined what he did on Friday nights when he disappeared.

Adrián kept looking at me while working shirtless. When I saw the bulge in his pants, I knew that afternoon was going to be very different.

It was two in the morning, it was the anniversary of my dead marriage, and I was crying on the couch. Marcos wrapped his arms around me and said he wasn’t going anywhere.

When I was left flat broke and unable to pay the rent, Lorenzo knocked on my door at ten sharp. I had never been with a man before that night.

We’d spent the whole wedding exchanging looks. When he whispered that he wanted to show me something, I thought it was a joke. It wasn’t.

Rodrigo went pale and pulled the phone away. I knew exactly what had happened before he even opened his mouth to explain.

He asked me for directions and I walked with him without thinking. I never imagined that minutes later I’d be against the wall of a building under construction with my pants at my ankles.

I saw him on the harbor terrace: tall, bearded, broad-shouldered. Marcos glanced at me, and I knew we were both thinking the same thing.

The first time I went in, I didn’t know what happened in the dark. A stranger’s hand brushed my leg and changed everything forever.

When I was left alone with Marcos, the lifelong neighbor, something shifted between us. He came closer slowly and kissed me without asking permission or forgiveness.

I went wearing a thong and garter stockings under my pants, not knowing if anything would happen. That night, everything did.