Alone at Home, I Discovered How Far My Desire Goes
The box had been closed at the back of the wardrobe for months. I opened it out of curiosity and, an hour later, I had my phone recording everything my body could feel.
The box had been closed at the back of the wardrobe for months. I opened it out of curiosity and, an hour later, I had my phone recording everything my body could feel.
I lowered the blinds, turned off my phone, and for once I stopped thinking about what was right. I just followed what my body had wanted for weeks.
I whispered my fantasy in her ear in the middle of the packed train car. She was startled, then bit my lip, and I knew that night we were heading to a hotel.
When Sofía opened that closet box, I knew the night wouldn’t end like the others. And yet I didn’t move.
When the scarf covered my eyes I thought it was an innocent game. It wasn’t. Mariela had other plans, and I didn’t want her to stop.
When they put me in that cell, I never imagined two strangers would turn it into the scene where I learned what it meant to surrender to desire and pleasure.
When she sat on my couch with smeared mascara and a trembling voice, I knew a whiskey and a few comforting words wouldn’t be enough.
We started talking by messages. We ended up seeing each other naked under the same red moon, each in our own city, each with the other’s breath on the screen.
I stopped in the hallway with my hand in the air. The sighs coming from my sister’s room wouldn’t let me knock or turn back.
I opened the door expecting dinner and found a slight girl with red-painted nails and a smile that said much more than “good evening.”
I thought the bathroom would be empty. Carolina was standing at the mirror, and her gaze wasn’t surprised: it was the gaze of someone who knew exactly what I had just done.
Caro was six years older than me, with a life that seemed perfect and a secret she meant to take to the grave. That night, she decided she couldn’t take it anymore.
When I took off my bikini top in front of Carolina, her face changed. And then I knew I wasn’t leaving the beach that afternoon as just her friend.
I pressed her shirt open against the wall in the vestibule, kissed her neck, and knew I wasn’t going to ask her to stay, even though I was dying to.
I crossed that door convinced women weren’t my thing. I left two hours later knowing that was the biggest lie I’d ever told myself.
She took the plush toy down from the top shelf, picked the right video, and prepared for a session no one else would ever know about.
In the drinks line she asked to smell my perfume. When she leaned in against my neck, I understood that night’s concert would end somewhere other than my home.
Nora had always admired her older sister more than she should have. What she didn’t know was that the woman she secretly desired was, in fact, her own mother.
I never thought something as stupid as a comb could leave me trembling, alone in my room, biting my lip so I wouldn’t scream.
I was doing homework when the heat between my legs distracted me. What I did next with that glass of ice changed the way I saw myself.