The Kiss That Changed Everything Six Days Before My Wedding

I was getting married in less than a week, and the nerves had me in pieces. Every day brought some forgotten detail, a vendor who wouldn’t answer, a decision I had to make right then and there. I was sleeping badly, eating less, and staring at myself in the mirror with the certainty that I would make it to the altar looking like I hadn’t rested in a month.

That afternoon I decided to steal an hour for myself. I sat down in a café in the city center, ordered tea, and let the steam calm me a little before getting back to my list of errands. When I left, still holding the memory of the warm cup, I collided head-on with someone on the sidewalk. I looked up and the world stopped.

It was Lucía.

—Hi —she said, with that smile I thought I had buried.

—Hi… Lucía.

—By the way, congratulations, Marina.

—Huh?… oh, yes… thanks.

I blushed like a teenager and couldn’t hide it. I hadn’t expected to see her, not like that, not six days before my wedding. Lucía and I had had a history some time ago. We had been inseparable back then, and she ended up falling in love with me. One night we ended up in the same bed and kept looking for each other for months. But I wasn’t ready to face what I felt for another woman, so one day I ended it all in the worst possible way. Soon after, she moved to another city and we lost touch. Until that moment.

—How did you know? —I asked, vaguely pointing to my own ring.

—From Carla. I still talk to her every now and then.

—Have you moved back here?

—Yes.

—How long ago?

—A few months.

—Wow… and you didn’t tell me anything.

—I thought you wouldn’t want to see me —she replied, lowering her voice a little—. I heard about your engagement and I didn’t want to complicate your life.

—I understand.

—And when is the big day?

—Next Sunday.

—You’re beautiful.

—Come on, I’m terrified and exhausted. You, on the other hand, are still the same as always.

—You look… really good, honestly —she repeated, and lowered her gaze.

Lucía was looking at me with a tenderness I recognized instantly. They were the same light green eyes that, in another time, made me feel like I was home. Her hair was different, shorter, but she was still that woman I had once been afraid of.

—Thanks —I murmured.

—I see you’re out running errands.

—Yes, though it’s mostly small stuff now. The last thing I have left is to go to the hair salon to decide on the hairstyle. Do you want to come with me?

I don’t know why I asked her. It came out of me without thinking, like a reflex that had been asleep for years and suddenly woke up.

—Okay. Sure —she said.

—Thanks.

***

As we walked, I surprised myself glancing at her out of the corner of my eye, up and down. Lucía was still a beautiful woman, slender, with a body I remembered better than I was willing to admit. I always thought that, if she had wanted to, she could have had whoever she pleased.

—So who’s the lucky guy? —she asked.

—His name is Andrés. I met him through a friend. We fell in love and… well, nothing too original, you know.

—Well, congratulations again. I hope you’re very happy.

—And you? Are you seeing anyone?

—Me? No. I had a relationship, but she left me —she said, and kept staring at me fixedly.

I had to look away. I didn’t know what to answer or where to put my hands.

—Let’s talk about that hairstyle instead —she added, rescuing me from the silence.

But from that point on we didn’t talk about anything. We walked on in silence, side by side. I had never stopped to think about the pain I had caused her. When we broke up, I only thought about myself, my fear, my need to run away. Now I was walking next to her and guilt tightened my chest. I stopped, took her hand, and asked her forgiveness.

—I’m so sorry, Lu. Forgive me. Back then I only thought about myself. I was scared and I didn’t want you to suffer, but I did everything wrong. I’m truly sorry.

—It’s all forgotten, okay? —she said softly.

But it wasn’t. I could read it in her eyes. Lucía looked at me the way she used to, with that sweetness she never knew how to fake. We were still holding hands. Moved, I stroked her cheek. She came closer slowly, never taking her eyes off me, hypnotizing me. She kissed me in the most delicate way there is, barely brushing her lips against mine. I couldn’t hold back and pressed my mouth to hers. The kiss lasted only a few seconds, but I felt an electric shock run through my entire body, from the nape of my neck to my knees.

I looked down, trembling. I let go of her hand and tried to change the subject, but the words wouldn’t come. We kept walking in silence. Nothing needed to be said.

At the hair salon, my mind never left that kiss. I wasn’t looking at the catalogs, I wasn’t listening to the stylist. I chose a hairstyle at random and, when I left, I wouldn’t have been able to describe it.

—Well —I told her, still nervous—, I should go home.

—Okay.

Neither of us moved. We stood there in the middle of the sidewalk, looking at each other, not wanting to part. Lucía made as if to take my hand, but pulled back at the last second.

—Good luck with the wedding. I hope you’re very happy.

And she turned around and walked away quickly. I would have sworn she was crying.

***

I got home and kept thinking about her, about the kiss, about her scent. Why had I kissed her? Why hadn’t I stopped trembling all afternoon? I thought that was all in the past. I was going to get married. I was confused, anxious, furious with myself.

But what upset me most was that we had parted without even exchanging phone numbers. Months could pass without our crossing paths again. Six days remained before my wedding, and the only thing I could think about was how to see her again. I hadn’t forgotten her. Despite the time, despite the ring, I felt that I was still in love with Lucía. Then I remembered Carla. She was my only hope.

—Hi, Carla, it’s Marina.

—Good evening! How’s the bride?

—Nervous. Very nervous.

—And what did you expect? The most important day of your life is coming up, princess.

—Yeah. Calm me down, come on.

—Ha ha. You really are a mess.

—Hey, I wanted to ask you something. I was told Lucía came back to the city and I’d like to invite her to the wedding. We were very good friends, but I don’t know how to reach her. Do you have her number?

—No.

Shit, I thought. I would never see her again. I felt a huge, dull pain in my chest.

—But I know where she works —Carla added a couple of seconds later.

—Yes? Where?

—At a law firm, in Clock Square. Méndez y asociados, or something like that.

—Thank you so much, Carla. Kisses.

—Bye, gorgeous.

I searched online for “Méndez y asociados,” the address, the hours. They closed at midday for a couple of hours. The next day I showed up in Clock Square right at lunchtime and sat on a bench opposite the building entrance. After half past one people began to come out: men in suits, impeccably dressed women. Almost the last to appear was Lucía. She saw me right away. She stood still for a few seconds and then came toward me.

—Hi —she said, sounding both surprised and pleased.

—Hi.

—I’m glad to see you again.

—Thanks. Look… yesterday… I don’t know, it felt like such a sad goodbye. I wanted to…

—You did right by coming.

—Yeah?

—I was planning to do the same this afternoon: go back to the café and see if I could find you.

We took each other’s hands and stood there looking at one another in silence. My heart was pounding wildly, my hands were sweating, my whole body was shaking. I understood without the slightest doubt that I still wanted her, that I was in love with her. And for the first time I had the courage to admit it out loud.

—I love you —I told her.

—I know. Come on.

***

We walked to a nearby hotel and rented a room. I wanted her with a urgency I didn’t remember ever feeling before.

As soon as the door closed, we melted into a kiss. Our mouths searched for each other as if they had been starving for years, and we held each other tightly, without mercy. When we finally broke apart to breathe, Lucía held my face in both hands and looked into my eyes.

—You’re the most beautiful woman in the world.

I kissed her again, grateful and thirsty. Then we started undressing each other, clumsy, hurried, our fingers tangling in buttons. It felt like we wanted to recover all the lost time in one go, as if we only had one minute left to live. She laid me on the bed and climbed on top of me, showering kisses over my neck, my cheeks, my lips, my chest. She was a whirlwind over my skin, and every touch made me burn more.

—I want you —she whispered in my ear.

—Devour me. I want nothing left of me.

—I missed your scent. It’s exactly how I remembered it.

—Touch me, please.

Lucía slid her hand between my legs and began to stroke me slowly, with a precision that made my back arch.

—Do you like that?

—Yes… so much… don’t stop.

—I love seeing you so surrendered.

—No one ever made me feel what you do. You have no idea how much I missed it.

—Then enjoy it. I want to see you enjoy yourself.

I was completely lost, surrendering to her fingers and those kisses that seemed to burn. She was a perfect lover, and I had to admit I had needed her far more than I ever acknowledged. How could I have given her up, given up that pleasure? I thought of Andrés, of how flat and mechanical everything felt with him, and that thought dissolved at once under Lucía’s hands.

She kept trailing her mouth over me. When she reached my breasts, she replaced kisses with gentle bites, and her tongue drew circles that made me writhe. I clung to the sheets, moaning, feeling pleasure come in waves. But Lucía saved the best for last: she moved her hand away and lowered her head between my legs, and when her tongue reached me I thought I was losing my mind.

—God… yes… Lucía, I’m dying —I gasped.

I exploded with a shudder that lifted me off the bed. I clamped my thighs shut all at once, trapping her between my legs, while convulsions shook me one after another. What pleasure someone can give just with their mouth. Endless.

Lucía climbed up beside me and we kissed for what felt like an eternity. I never got tired of her lips. I felt the softness of her skin against mine, heard her breathing.

—I don’t want to move. I’d stay like this forever —I told her.

—I know. Me too.

—How could I have been so stupid as to walk away from you?

—Maybe it had to happen so we could find each other again.

—I’ll never forgive myself for making you suffer.

—I’ve just forgotten it. I love you.

Now that I had recovered from the orgasm, something inside me pushed me to give her back all that pleasure. I started kissing her neck while my hand moved over her whole body, lingering on her breasts, the ones that fascinated me so much. Feeling the heat of her skin and noticing how she shivered with every caress lit me up again. I couldn’t hold back and bit her neck. Lucía let out a small cry.

—I love your body —I told her.

—It doesn’t belong to me anymore. It’s yours; it has been for a long time.

I didn’t wait any longer and lowered my head between her legs. I had always loved feeling her heat, and I started kissing and licking her, seeking her pleasure. Lucía shuddered, fragile as a leaf shaken by the wind. It drove me wild to see her like that, undone, trembling, moaning, writhing beneath my mouth.

—Like that, yes. Don’t stop, please, keep going.

And I worked to give her everything she asked for, to take her as far as she had taken me minutes before. I was happy to have her, to have her surrender, her moans, and, at last, her orgasm, which shook her whole body and infected me with her pleasure.

We stayed wrapped in each other’s arms for a long time. The room slowly grew darker. In those moments nothing else existed in the world, only her and me. No one else. Nothing else.

Before leaving the room, I left my boyfriend a voice message.

—I can’t marry you, Andrés. I’m truly sorry. I beg you to forgive me.

I hugged Lucía, who rested her head on my shoulder.

—I love you —she told me.