Masturbation

I knew what I wanted to do that night. I only needed darkness, silence, and the courage not to set myself any limits for even one moment.

When she came into my room that night, wearing nothing, I knew it wasn’t just because she was afraid of the thunder. My mother knew everything. And so did I.

She was 67 and had the smile of someone who’d seen it all. When I got her into bed that New Year’s Eve, I never guessed I’d end up watching her for hours.

Sofía had been wearing that mischievous look for weeks. When she suggested a stranger watch her touch herself on camera while I observed in silence, I said yes without hesitation.

There was something about the way he looked at me from the platform. It wasn’t just any look. I knew that if I went with him, I’d never be the same.

They were both standing in the doorway of my room, watching me sleep. She was touching herself. So was he. And when I opened my eyes, neither of them stopped.

At nineteen, after a lifetime in all-girls schools, that night I learned more than I could have imagined.

He asked me for a light, and when I held out my lighter, his eyes dazzled me. Five minutes later, we were heading to his apartment, and I still had no idea what I’d gotten myself into.

I’d been keeping that curiosity to myself for years. In the dark, with him a meter away, I felt that if I didn’t ask then, I never would.

We’d been together in front of the screen for months, each on his side. The afternoon Marcos reached out to me changed everything between us forever.

The teachers’ lounge seemed empty at that hour. I pushed the door open without knocking and there she was on the sofa, completely lost in herself.

When I heard the door opening, I knew it was my son. It was already too late to stop what was happening, and I didn’t want to.

Rodrigo opened the door and found his neighbor in the hallway, teary-eyed, her dress tight. What she asked him for minutes later had no name.

I’d spent years watching other people do it on screen. The first time I touched a real girl, I understood no video prepares you for that feeling.

Claudia looked at her in a way Sofía could no longer pretend not to understand. That afternoon, neither of them would look away.

From the moment we started drinking together, I could feel them devouring me with their eyes. It wasn’t curiosity — it was hunger. I decided to give them what they wanted without letting them touch me.

We were a married couple used to sharing everything. When Marcos arrived from tour with that same old smile, we knew dinner would have to wait.

Rodrigo held her hips during their workouts and she pretended not to notice his erection. When she found her panties in his room, she could no longer ignore what was happening.

Carmen appeared at my window as if she had been waiting for that moment. She didn’t leave. She made me come downstairs. What happened next was beyond anything either of us imagined.

I got there before Daniela and a girl offered me a drink at the bar. I didn’t know that night we’d end up the three of us in bed, doing things none of us had planned.