Those Forbidden Summers I Still Remember

Now I’m 23 and I can tell this without the weight I carried for a long time. It was the summers when I was 19, when I lived in a quiet neighborhood on the outskirts and my life revolved around five people: Marcos and Sebastián, twins who lived door to door in our building, their sister Laura, who was two years older than all of us, and my sister Valentina, a year younger than me.

We’d been inseparable since we were little. The kind of gang that shares everything: recess, summer afternoons, secrets. And also, when the time came, the discovery of sex.

Marcos had an accident in late autumn the year before. A jump from the harbor rocks, badly judged, badly executed. He was left paralyzed from the waist down. He was 19, and suddenly the world he knew changed in a way none of us knew how to process properly.

But he didn’t want our gang to change. We kept going everywhere with him; the wheelchair wasn’t an obstacle, just part of the group. And that attitude of his, that way he had of refusing to let misfortune crush him, made us love him even more.

***

It was Laura who changed the rhythm of that summer.

She was 21 and had a body we’d long been sneaking glances at without daring to say anything. Tall, brunette, moving with a confident ease, as if she knew exactly the effect she had. One hot afternoon in July the five of us were in her room with the fan on full blast, bored and with no plan.

Laura stood up, went to the door, and locked it. She turned and looked at the four of us with a calm expression that carried more authority than any shout.

—If you want to learn to enjoy sex, you have to start by knowing how to kiss properly —she said.

Nobody spoke. Marcos flashed that crooked smile he got when something made him nervous but he didn’t want to admit it.

—What we do here stays here. Nothing leaves this room. Understood?

We all nodded.

—Valentina, come here. We’re going to show them how it’s done.

My sister didn’t hesitate. She got up from the floor where she’d been sitting and went over to Laura. The two of them looked at each other for a moment, and then their mouths met with a softness I hadn’t expected to see. It started slowly, just lips, and gradually opened up until their tongues began to move together, wet, slow, with that insolent confidence of people who know how to use their mouths to make the tension in an entire room rise.

Laura held Valentina by the nape and squeezed just enough to deepen the kiss, while my sister let out a brief gasp against her mouth. Laura’s tongue slid in and out with a rhythm, searching, testing, teaching. Valentina copied her immediately, shy at first, but soon following eagerly, sucking, barely biting the lower lip, leaving a thread of saliva when they parted for a second before throwing themselves back into it.

The three of us watched without breathing. I felt something tighten in my chest and lower down too, an awkward cock waking up in my pants at the sight of two women kissing with such hunger in front of us.

When they pulled apart, Laura looked at us calmly.

—That’s how it’s done. Now you practice with each other. No matter the sex. Everyone with everyone.

***

The following days were a string of stolen kisses in corners, loaded looks in class, nights when it took me hours to fall asleep. The group started touching each other more confidently, slowly but steadily.

One afternoon it was my turn to kiss Valentina for the first time as part of the group. It was strange at first. She’s my sister. But she was also an 18-year-old who kissed me back without hesitation, parting her lips just a little and sliding her tongue in with a naturalness that left me stunned. Our mouths fit together obscenely easily, wet, hot, and the brush of her breath against mine made me rock-hard instantly.

—Are you okay? —she asked softly when we broke apart.

—Yeah —I said, and it was true.

Sebastián and Marcos were watching us from the other side of the room. The twins had that strange bond twins have, able to communicate with a glance.

—You’re not the only ones in the room —Sebastián said with a smile.

—I know —I answered.

***

The Friday night everything changed, the twins’ parents and my mother had plans to dine out and then end the night at some bar. Laura convinced everyone to stay over at her place.

We waited the required thirty minutes after the door closed. Laura was strict about that.

—They might have forgotten something.

And she was right. At the twenty-second minute Elena, the twins’ mother, came back to get her husband’s bag. If we hadn’t waited, they’d have caught us with our hands in the act.

When the door closed a second time, Laura turned off the TV and looked at us.

—Tonight we learn everything —she said.

Valentina made a sound somewhere between a laugh and a sigh.

We undressed in Laura’s room. It was the first time we saw each other like that, the five of us together, naked. Marcos was in his chair, and far from being uncomfortable, he was the first to crack a joke and break the tension.

—Not such a bad view, either —he said.

We all laughed.

What followed was a kind of liturgy Laura directed with astonishing patience. First the kissing, which we already had down. Then the touching. Then something more.

I went first. Laura laid me on the bed and started to travel over me slowly with her mouth, taking her time, going down my neck, sucking my collarbone, licking my chest, and then burying her face between my legs with brutal naturalness. She grabbed my thighs to spread me wider and set to work with her tongue and lips on the head of my cock, first softly, then deeper, swallowing as much of it as she could and making a wet sound every time she pulled back to lick again.

Her hands never stopped. One squeezed my ass, the other held the base of my cock so I wouldn’t move too much. The feel of her mouth drove me slowly insane: the heat, the pressure, the exact rhythm with which she alternated quick sucks and long strokes of her tongue over the frenulum and the head. When she took me deeper, grazing my throat with the tip, I arched on the bed and had to bite the back of my hand so I wouldn’t groan too loudly.

—Breathe —she said, and the sound of her voice was almost as intense as what she was doing.

Sebastián was beside me, going through the same thing. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Valentina lean over Marcos with a tenderness that surprised me, taking her time with him, paying attention as if there were nobody else in the room. Marcos lifted his torso slightly, guiding her with a hand at the nape of her neck, while she slowly swallowed his cock, enjoying having him hard between her lips.

Laura alternated between Sebastián and me, unhurried, giving each of us the time we needed. She knelt between one pair of legs, made him cum in her mouth or left him trembling before moving on to the next. There was something in that unhurried generosity that made everything feel different from what I had imagined it would be. It wasn’t a quick fuck or a hidden shambles; it was a fucking full lesson, dirty, exact, with saliva shining at the corners of her lips and our ragged breathing filling the room.

—There’s more —Laura said after we’d been at it a good while—. Lift your legs.

I did it without asking. What came next was a sensation I hadn’t expected, a current that ran up from the base of my spine and left me speechless for several seconds. Laura slid in two fingers first, slowly, and then came back with her tongue, alternating pressure and wetness, searching for that exact spot that made me tremble. When she found it, the jolt of pleasure hit me like a shock, my whole abdomen tightening while she kept the rhythm, determined to wring every last groan out of me.

—There are important points here too —she explained, never stopping what she was doing—. Learn to find them in your partners.

Sebastián looked at me wide-eyed.

—Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

—I don’t know what you’re thinking —I answered with difficulty.

—That this is the best thing that’s ever happened to me.

***

When it was their turn, we took the time to give back everything we’d received.

I went over to Laura more calmly than I expected. I kissed her slowly, letting my mouth do its work before moving my hands. Her breasts were firm and warm, and her skin had a clean smell that stayed etched in my memory forever. I slid my fingers along her waist, then her back, and lower down I found the edge of her panties already soaked through by all the arousal I’d worked up in her beforehand.

—Here —she guided me, taking my hand where she needed it.

I followed her instructions. I parted her legs carefully and sank two fingers into her, feeling how hot and slippery she was. When I found the exact spot, her reaction was immediate and real, with no artifice. She tensed her legs and let the air out slowly through her lips, moving her hips to take my fingers deeper while I licked her clit hard, first with short laps and then with a firm, insistent tongue, until I saw her losing control little by little.

—Stay there —she said through clenched teeth—. Don’t move.

I didn’t move. I watched her come, focused, attentive to every signal her body gave me. Her cunt clamped down hard around my fingers, trembled all over, and a rough moan came up from her throat before she ran out of breath. I kept the rhythm until her thighs began to shake and then I eased off, slowly licking away the wetness she’d left on my mouth and chin.

When she finished, she stayed there for a few seconds with her eyes closed, breathing. Then she smiled.

—Good. Very good.

Valentina was close by. Our eyes met and there was a moment of silence between us, a question neither of us voiced but both understood.

—Come here —she said.

I went over. What followed was different from what I’d done with Laura, neither better nor worse, just different. More intimate, maybe, because of everything that moment carried between the two of us.

She grabbed me by the neck when what I was doing started to take effect. I felt her breathing speed up, her fingers pressing harder into me. I spread her legs and touched her patiently, kissing her belly, then moving down between her thighs until I had her wet, shining, trembling under my tongue. When I pried her legs farther apart with my knee and slid my cock into her slowly, I felt the jolt of her body and mine mixing into the same stab of pleasure and vertigo.

—Rodrigo —she whispered, and in that one word there was everything: the surprise, the pleasure, the vertigo of crossing something that could never be uncrossed.

When she finished, she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

—Does anything hurt?

—No. It’s just a lot. Everything is a lot.

I understood perfectly.

***

The part that came next was the one we’d all been thinking about for weeks without saying it out loud.

Laura explained things as always: calmly, in detail, without drama.

—When you’re ready, tell me.

No one took long.

My first time was with Laura. She took control from the very beginning, telling me how to position myself, how to move, when to go slower. There was no clumsiness or shame. Only focus and a feeling that took me several minutes to process properly. She rode me with her legs open, guiding me with her hands on my hips, and I entered her slowly, feeling her cunt wrap around me with a wet, deep pressure that made me close my eyes for a second.

—That’s it —Laura said, squeezing my ass to set the rhythm—. Like that, don’t rush.

I moved the way she told me to, pulling out just a little and pushing back in, deeper each time, until the sound of our bodies began to fill the room: skin against skin, broken breaths, the wet smack of each thrust. Laura stared at me fixedly, lips parted, and when I changed the angle a little she arched her back and let out a long moan, the kind that tells you exactly when you’re hitting the right spot.

There was no way it was going to last long the first time. But it was enough to know nothing would ever be the same after that night.

When I finished, Sebastián gave me a light tap on the shoulder.

—Welcome —he said.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Marcos with Valentina. She was on top of him, moving with a confidence that surprised me. The chair took nothing away from the scene; Marcos handled it with his hands on her hips while she slid up and down, rubbing against him until he made her tremble. I watched her for a moment from the other side of the room, not quite sure what to feel.

She’s my sister. But she’s also a person who chose this. And that belongs to her.

Then it was Valentina and my turn.

I positioned myself over her slowly. She looked me straight in the eyes, never looking away.

—Careful —she said.

—Yeah.

I went in slowly. She tensed her shoulders for a moment and then relaxed them, letting the air out through her nose. I kissed her neck while I penetrated her patiently, each push deeper than the last, until I felt her completely open and hot around me. Valentina held my back with both hands and started moving with me, lifting her hips so each thrust would be more direct, dirtier, harder to keep from losing control over.

—Are you okay?

—Keep going —she answered—. Please.

What came after wasn’t just sex. It was something harder to name, something that had to do with knowing each other in a way that has no way back. We moved together, without hurry, paying attention to each other as we never had before. I ran my hands over her body, squeezing her breasts, then down to her stomach and thighs while she arched beneath me, asking for more with every gasp.

I felt her breath against my neck, her legs around me, the heat of her skin pressed to mine. It wasn’t just the body that was there. It was all of her, and all of me, and we both knew what that meant.

When we finished, we both cried a little. Not from sadness. From something like astonishment, from the realization that something between us had changed forever, and neither of us regretted it.

***

The twins and I slept in their room that night. The girls stayed in Laura’s room.

Before we turned out the light, Marcos spoke from his bed.

—How are you?

—I don’t know —I said, and it was the most honest answer I could give.

—Me neither.

Sebastián was already breathing in his sleep. Outside, the street was quiet.

—Thanks for not leaving us out —Marcos said softly, not specifying exactly what he meant, but I understood it in every possible way.

—That’s what friends are for —I replied.

It took me a long time to fall asleep. I heard when the parents came back, the low voices in the hallway, the door to the girls’ room someone opened carefully.

—Look at these cuties —I heard Elena say—. Sleeping together like when they were little.

I smiled in the dark and closed my eyes.

***

I’m 23 years old and those memories are still vivid. Not with guilt, but with a kind of strange tenderness, the way you remember something that once belonged to you in a time that’s already gone and can’t be erased.

Valentina and I are still close. We never talk about that night directly, but we don’t need to. There are things that are understood without words between people who have shared something like that.

Laura moved to another city two years later. Marcos adapted to a life he never asked for but knew how to make his own. Sebastián is still one of those people who are likeable in any circumstance.

We were five friends who grew up together, and somewhere along the way we grew in that other way too. No drama, no consequences we couldn’t bear. Just five young people who chose to share something unforgettable.

Things kept happening after that first night. Many things. But that’s another story.