My Friend Visited Me and Loved Me as the Woman I Am

I met Damián when we were still two kids sneaking out of class to smoke behind the school gym. He was my best friend throughout adolescence, the first one who stood up for me when the others laughed at me, the only one who never asked me why I walked differently or why I felt uncomfortable in my own body. Then life separated us: he went to study in the capital and I stayed in my city, fighting with who I was and who I wanted to become.

Many years passed before we saw each other again. He showed up one morning at my workplace, by chance, to handle some random errand. I was no longer the person he remembered. I had transitioned, my name was Mariana, and the woman who got up from her desk to hug him had nothing to do with the shy boy of his youth. I confessed everything to him that afternoon at my house, with my heart in my throat. And instead of rejecting me, he looked at me like no one had ever looked at me before. That night we were lovers for the first time, and I discovered that the desire between us had been asleep for far too long.

***

One Wednesday he wrote to me. He said he had a few days off and wanted to spend the weekend with me, that he hadn’t stopped thinking about that afternoon. I read the message three times before believing it. I replied yes, that I was waiting for him with open arms, and when I hit send I felt a tingle race through my whole body.

He’s going to come just to be with me.

That thought stayed with me all week. He would come on Friday, around eight at night, driving from the capital. I organized myself with the precision of someone preparing something important: I cleaned the house, bought a bottle of red wine and two new glasses, changed the sheets for satin ones I had kept unused. I wanted every detail to tell him what words sometimes can’t manage to say.

By Friday morning, my chest was already overflowing with excitement. I went to a beauty salon someone had recommended to me, where Brisa, another trans girl with magical hands for makeup, worked. We hit it off right away, the kind of friendship that is born in an hour and lasts for years. While she did my hair and lined my eyes, I told her I was expecting someone special.

—Then let’s leave him speechless —she said, smiling at the mirror.

And did she ever. When she finished, the woman staring back at me from the glass was radiant. The makeup made my eyes stand out without overdoing them, and my lips were a wine shade that begged to be kissed. I left there feeling sure of myself, feeling more beautiful than ever.

Back home, I took my time getting dressed. I chose a black lingerie set I had bought thinking of him: delicate lace, a thong that barely covered what it needed to, a garter belt that hugged my thighs. Over it I put on a short dress in the same color, fitted at the hips, with a neckline that promised without showing too much. I perfumed my neck, my wrists, the hollow between my breasts. I looked at myself one last time and knew I was ready.

***

I waited for him in the living room, biting my lip every time a car passed by on the street. When I finally heard the engine slow to a stop in front of my house, my heart jolted. I ran to open the electric gate and saw his headlights glide in slowly. He parked, turned off the engine, and when he got out of the car I froze for a second, remembering why I had wanted him so badly.

I didn’t give him time for anything. I went up to him with all the femininity I carried inside, threw my arms around his neck, and found his mouth. I kissed him deeply, openly, letting him feel how much I had missed him.

—I love you —I whispered against his lips—. I haven’t stopped thinking about you.

He drew back just enough to look me up and down, and there was something in his eyes that made me tremble.

—Mariana, you’re gorgeous —he said in a hoarse voice—. More of a woman than ever. Forgive me for taking so long to come back, work has me traveling all the time. But now that you’ll have vacation, I’m taking you with me.

Hearing him, something inside me came undone. I kissed him again, now with a smile I couldn’t contain.

—Of course —I told him—. Wherever you want.

I helped him take his bag out of the car and we went into the house together, his fingers laced with mine. We went up to my room so he could leave his things. As soon as we closed the door, we kissed again, this time more slowly, rediscovering each other.

—I’m going to take a quick shower —he told me, caressing my cheek—. I came straight from the road.

—Go, my love —I replied—. I’ll get something ready for a toast and wait downstairs for you.

***

I went down to the living room and poured the wine into the two new glasses. My hands trembled a little, not from nerves, but from pure anticipation. I could hear him moving upstairs, the water running, his footsteps. Every sound made me burn a little more.

When he came down, he was wearing only a white robe loosely tied at the waist, his hair still damp. I got up from the sofa and walked toward him. I handed him a glass and we touched crystal to crystal without saying anything, just looking at each other.

—To us —he said at last.

—To this weekend —I added.

We took a sip and I set my glass on the table. I slipped my arms around his neck and pressed myself against him. We kissed long and unhurriedly, tongues searching, his hands sliding down my back to settle on my hips. I felt him pull me against his body and, beneath the robe, his desire beginning to wake.

I slid my fingers to the knot at his waist and pulled slowly. The robe opened and my breath caught. He was completely naked underneath, and seeing him like that, ready for me, ignited me in a way I don’t remember ever having felt before. I kissed his neck, went down over his chest, left a trail of kisses along his belly as I knelt in front of him.

I took him in my hand and started slowly, with my tongue first, tracing him all over before taking him into my mouth. I loved doing that. I loved hearing him breathe harder, feeling his thighs tense, knowing it was me taking him to that point.

—Like that, Mariana —he murmured, burying his fingers in my hair—. Don’t stop.

I did as he asked. I sucked him eagerly, setting a rhythm, letting him slide in and out of my mouth while I looked up at him from below. He held my head gently, guiding me, and I felt completely his, thirsty for him. I ran my tongue up and down him, slowly, then took him fully again, as far as I could.

When both of us were already too aroused to keep holding back, he leaned down, took me by the arms, and lifted me. He kissed me with new urgency, raised me off the floor, and carried me to the bedroom.

***

He laid me on the satin sheets and stretched out over me without stopping kissing me. He began undressing me slowly, sliding the dress off my shoulders, revealing the black lingerie I had chosen for him. When he saw the lace, the garter belt hugging my thighs, he let out a sigh that made me smile.

—You dressed like this for me —he said, more of a statement than a question.

—Only for you —I answered.

He lowered his mouth to my breasts and kissed them, caressed them with his lips, and I arched my back against the mattress, feeling pleasure rise through my whole body. Every kiss of his was a current. I shuddered all over, giving myself to him without reservation, wanting him with every inch of my skin.

He stripped me completely, leaving me at last only in the thong. He turned me carefully so I was face down and ran his tongue over my back, kissed my shoulders, my hips, my buttocks. I writhed on the sheets, already out of patience.

—Now —I begged him in a whisper—. I need you.

He settled me on my knees, gave me a soft smack, and kissed my skin again. I couldn’t stand the waiting. I turned back toward him, took him, and sucked him again for a moment, just to make sure he was as crazy as I was. Then we held each other, rolled across the bed between kisses, both of us melting into the same fire, until he put me in the position in which he wanted to make me his.

He took the gel from the nightstand and prepared himself calmly, without haste, looking me in the eyes the whole time. He lifted my legs and rested them on his shoulders, drew me toward him. When he entered me, slowly, letting me feel every instant, an immense pleasure ran through me from head to toe.

—Slowly —I asked him, and he obeyed.

He moved carefully at first, giving me time to get used to it, reading in my face when he could go a little further. I clung to the sheets, to his arms, to whatever I could. Little by little the rhythm grew, and with it the pleasure, until it became something that left me unable to think of anything else.

—Don’t stop —I begged—. Don’t stop, please.

We answered each other as if we had been doing it all our lives. He thrust and I met him, both of us lost, both of us looking for the same thing. The room filled with our broken breathing, with the sound of our bodies meeting over and over again.

I couldn’t control myself. Pleasure hit me like a wave that left me trembling, clinging to him with all my strength, repeating his name without even realizing it. He sped up a little more, held my hips tightly, and a moment later I felt him finish inside me with a deep groan that raised goosebumps all over my skin.

He let his body fall over mine, exhausted, and I wrapped my arms around him against my chest. We stayed like that for a long while, without speaking, catching our breath, our legs still tangled and our hearts beating out of sync. I kissed his damp forehead and he kissed my neck, and in that silence there was room for everything we had not said to each other in years.

***

That weekend belonged to the two of us and to no one else. We ordered food, watched movies stretched out on the sofa, laughed remembering old school mischief, and went back to bed as many times as our bodies allowed. Damián treated me like the woman I had always known I was, and for the first time in a long time I felt complete, desired, at peace with myself.

On Sunday afternoon, while I was packing his bag to return to the capital, he hugged me from behind and spoke into my ear.

—I was serious about the vacation —he said—. Next time, you’re coming with me.

I turned in his arms and kissed him, knowing I wasn’t going to let so many years pass again this time. Some reunions are not coincidence. They are simply life putting in its place what was always destined to find each other.