My First Double Penetration Was When I Was Alone

Hello again, dear readers. Today I want to tell you how my first real encounter with double penetration went, though perhaps the word “encounter” isn’t quite the most accurate, because that first time there was no one else in the room but me.

As those who follow me already know, ever since I started discovering my own body I’ve been fascinated by threesomes with two men and one woman. The first video I ever watched in secret, heart pounding and the volume almost all the way down, was exactly that: a girl between two guys who were using her at the same time. From that day on, the idea got stuck in me like a sweet thorn that never quite let go.

The fantasy of being fucked from the front and the back at the same time stayed with me for years. I imagined it in the shower, before going to sleep, during the dead time on the bus on the way to work. But one thing is to dream about it and another very different thing is to dare. And before looking for two flesh-and-blood men, I wanted to know what it felt like. I wanted to try it my way, without haste and without witnesses.

In a previous story I told you that, when I bought my second vibrator, I included a box of condoms and a bottle of lubricant in the same order. You can already guess why. I’d spent weeks with those toys tucked away in the nightstand drawer, beneath a pile of socks, waiting for the right moment. The problem was that there was never a right moment at home.

***

The moment arrived on a Friday in the middle of summer. My parents and my brother were leaving to spend the weekend at the lake house with my uncles, and I was the one staying behind. I made up that I had Marina’s birthday party, my best friend’s, and that I preferred to sleep in my own bed. Nobody suspected a thing. When the car drove away down the street and the sound of the engine faded, I stood in the hallway, listening to the silence of the whole house being mine.

I had the whole night. I had every room. And I had that idea that had been circling around me for months.

I didn’t rush straight to the bedroom. I wanted it to be slow, almost a ceremony. I poured myself a glass of white wine, took a long shower, shaved at a leisurely pace, and let the hot water relax every muscle. While I dried off in front of the mirror, I looked at myself in a way I usually didn’t: with desire. My cheeks were flushed before I had even begun.

I closed the curtains in the room even though I didn’t need to, turned on only the bedside lamp, and put on an audio story on my phone. Lately, audio stories turned me on more than videos; I liked imagining the faces, the bodies, the details the voice only suggested. I chose one in which two men took turns with a woman, to match what I had in mind. The first whispers from that recording made my skin prickle.

I took my two vibrators, the condoms and the lubricant out of their hiding place, and laid everything out on the bed like someone arranging her tools before an important job. I was hot before I had even touched myself. I could feel dampness between my legs just from thinking about what I was going to do.

***

I stripped completely naked and lay on my back on the cool sheets. The voice on the audio filled the room. I brought one hand to my clit and began stroking myself in slow circles, unhurried, letting the tension build on its own. With the other hand I took the first vibrator, ran it over my sex to wet it, and once it was well lubricated, slid it inside me.

I let out my breath sharply. I set it to the lowest speed, a soft, steady vibration that kept me on the edge without pushing me all the way over, and then I started on the other part of the plan.

I moistened my index finger with my own slick and slowly brought it to my ass. I traced circles around it, pressing just a little, getting used to the idea before the sensation. Then I opened the lubricant, coated my fingers, and applied a good amount. The first time I slipped the tip of my index finger in, I held my breath. I felt the muscle resist for a second and then yield, opening around my finger. It was a strange, new sensation, but by no means unpleasant.

I waited. I was in no hurry, and that was exactly the best thing about being alone: nobody set the pace but me. When I felt my body relax, I added more lubricant and another finger. That time it did hurt. It stung a little, a faint burn that made me wrinkle my forehead.

I kept my fingers still inside and, with my other hand, kept playing with my clit so I wouldn’t lose the arousal. It worked. The pleasure in front covered over the discomfort in back, and little by little the burn turned into something else, into a pressure I started to like more than I’d expected. My breathing was broken up and small moans slipped out of me without my being able to stop them.

I needed to come. I needed it with an almost painful urgency. But I had promised myself something: the first orgasm of the night had to be with both toys inside at once. I wanted my first double penetration, even if it was with myself, to be exactly the fantasy I had imagined so many times. So I clenched my teeth and held out.

***

I repeated the process with a third finger, adding more lubricant each time, until I felt my body was ready. Then I took a condom from the box and put it on the second vibrator. I had no one to explain it to, but hygiene is hygiene, and the idea of doing it properly gave me a strange calm. I added more lubricant to my ass and coated the toy too, until it was shining.

For a moment I removed the vibrator from my pussy to concentrate. I pressed the tip of the other one against my asshole, relaxed as much as I could, and pushed. When the head went in, a long moan escaped me, half surprise, half pleasure. I stayed still, giving my body time to understand what was happening. Then I pushed the rest in, slowly, millimeter by millimeter, until I had it all the way inside me.

It was, as I said, a very strange sensation. A fullness I had never felt before, a pressure filling a space I hadn’t even known was empty. And again: strange, yes, but not in a bad way. In the best way of all.

I waited a few minutes to get used to that invasion. Then I started moving it, first carefully and then with more confidence, fucking my ass at my own pace. With my free hand I took the first vibrator and plunged it back into my pussy. And there it was: impaled from front and back, exactly as I had dreamed so many nights, fulfilling the fantasy in some way, even if it was alone and with my own hands.

***

I knew I wouldn’t last much longer. So I stopped holding back and started moving with both toys at once. It took me a little while to find the rhythm, but when I did, it was like discovering a secret choreography in my own body: when one went into my vagina, the other came out of my ass, and vice versa, in a continuous back-and-forth that gave me not a single second to breathe. On top of that, every time I pushed the vibrator in front, the back of my hand brushed my clit.

Pleasure rose in waves. I wasn’t even listening to the audio anymore; the voices had become background noise, eclipsed by my own breathing and the wet sounds of the toys. I closed my eyes and let myself be carried away by the images inside my head, those two faceless figures I’d been inventing for years.

I felt my muscles tightening inside. I had a strange sensation, as if I wanted to push something out, a pressure that kept growing and growing. I arched my back against the mattress and my toes curled. I was close, so close it almost scared me.

I sped up. Harder. Deeper. I was fucking myself with a fury I didn’t recognize, as if I were trying to reach something that kept slipping away by inches. And then it happened.

I let out the loudest moan I had ever released in my life, a sound that bounced off the walls of the empty room, at the same time as the most intense orgasm I had felt up to that moment shot through me from head to toe. My legs shook uncontrollably. The sheets beneath me were soaked through. I lay there panting, with both toys still inside me and a stupid smile on my face.

***

It took me a long while to catch my breath. I pulled them out carefully, one and then the other, and lay staring at the ceiling while my heart slowly came back down. I thought that if a double penetration on my own could make me feel like that, I didn’t even want to imagine what it would be like with two real men.

Someday, I told myself. Someday I’ll really try it.

But that, dear readers, is another story I’m not ready to tell yet. For now, I’m left with that summer night, the whole house to myself, and my first encounter, clumsy and wonderful, with one of my oldest fantasies.