First Time

I left the gym without showering, just as he’d asked. That afternoon I discovered that obeying another man could give me more pleasure than taking charge.

I’d spent months fantasizing about being with a trans girl. That night, in the passenger seat, she whispered in my ear that she’d noticed the way I was looking at her.

After midnight I put on the red heels, opened the gate with the remote, and went out for a walk. I only wanted to feel seen. I didn’t expect someone to stop.

He watched me from the armchair while I knelt in front of the stranger I’d picked at the bar. It was my first night being a whore.

I left my father’s villa for my grandparents’ house in the village. I had no idea my aunt, the most devout woman in town, would end up naked in my bed for an envelope full of bills.

He had never seen a man like Lamine, and from the very first day he knew he would do anything to get back inside his house.

That night I put on the red thong, the fishnets, and the wig in front of the hotel mirror, and for the first time I didn’t recognize the same old boy.

My family was one floor below and I was alone in my room, phone pressed to my ear, his voice ordering me to do things I’d never dared before.

We were newbies and nervous, but that couple sitting at the back of the club looked at us like they already knew exactly what we’d come for.

I was seventeen and had a girlfriend who was crazy about another guy. It took me a year to realize that betrayal didn’t hurt me —it excited me.

I ordered my first toy online so I wouldn’t die of embarrassment in the store. What I didn’t imagine was the delivery guy’s face when he handed me that box.

The first afternoon I went to help him, I thought I’d only be doing his exercises. I never imagined I’d end up discovering with him everything my home had denied me.

I was twenty-two and had never been with another man. When I pushed open the ajar door to 5B, I knew I wouldn’t leave that night the same man I’d been when I walked in.

I had spent months preparing for Adrián, but it was another man who taught me that night what it really means to give yourself over.

When she hung up the phone, I knew I’d be at her place the next day. Her husband was away. And my daughter would never look at me the same way again.

I got there at seven in the evening to look after her. At midnight I carried her to bed. At dawn I passed her half-open door and knew my life had just changed.

I’d never done it with anyone. And the first person who entered me wasn’t my boyfriend, but his father, one afternoon when the house was empty and I couldn’t say no.

He came out of the shower with the towel at his waist, as always that afternoon. But that neighbor’s look wasn’t the usual one, and he knew it before he even opened his mouth.

She knocked on my door at midnight with red eyes and a broken voice. I didn’t expect the last night of the trip to end with my student in my bed.

We’d spent months fucking under the rule that he was straight. That night, with my plan on hold, he looked at me in silence and I knew something was about to break.