Masturbation

My tutor had just fallen asleep when I discovered the half-open drawer of her bedside table. Inside, something was shining that was about to change everything between us.

I pulled the curtain aside in fear, thinking they were burglars. What I saw in the patio left me breathless and trembling between my legs.

When she suggested that the loser take off a piece of clothing, I said yes without thinking. I never imagined what would come next—or that we’d end up naked.

It was the first time I saw her appear in a nightdress at three in the morning, barefoot and with that smile that asked permission without asking.

I went downstairs in the middle of the night for a glass of water. The back bedroom door was half open, and from inside came a faint light and two conspiratorial laughs.

That afternoon I turned the telescope without expecting anything new, and I saw her: kneeling on the chair, oblivious to the fact that a stranger thirty meters away was watching in silence.

The call came on a Saturday at dusk. Her parents were away, and her voice on the phone trembled a little. I knew then the night wasn’t going to end early.

I started by filling balloons with warm water so I’d feel like I had breasts. I ended up gluing them to my nipples and finding a pleasure I didn’t know I was looking for.

I locked the door and became someone else in the mirror. I didn’t count on him having a copy of the key.

I went out to get some air while he slept. The lights in the apartment across the way were still on, and then I heard a moan that wasn’t mine and knew I was going to keep watching.

The first time I aimed my sons’ old telescope toward the window across the street, I knew I had become something my husband would never imagine.

He had spent years pressing his ear to the walls of cheap motels. One night he found a forum promising more: booths with a view of other people’s pleasure.

All she had to do was hint at something and I'd get on all fours. That night I discovered she had two surprises hidden away—and only one was for me.

I woke with my body burning and my hand between my legs. I never imagined my sister would open the door that morning… or what would happen next.

“Don’t rush,” she murmured against the wall. “I want to feel everything you do, slowly, until the whole night feels too short.”

When I walked into the teachers’ lounge, hands wrapped around me from behind and lips slid down my neck. I recognized her perfume instantly.

For days I had felt eyes fixed on the back of my neck while I played. That Friday I locked the doors and came down from the stage determined to find her.

He had a meeting and left me alone all afternoon. Bored, I opened a folder on his computer I had no business opening… and couldn’t stop looking.

I climbed the tree behind the dormitory to confirm what I already knew. I never imagined seeing her with him on the balcony would awaken something between rage and desire I’d never felt.

When she gave me the keys to her apartment and left for work, I already knew that night we were going to debut much more than the bottle of wine I had packed in my suitcase.