Masturbation

It started as a joke while watching videos in bed. It ended with both of us bent over the mattress, trying something we never thought possible.

I never wanted to go on camera. Until one night, curiosity won out and a faceless user asked to be alone with me.

That afternoon I wanted something different, something to pull me out of boredom. I found a stranger willing to watch while I let myself be watched.

I had been walking for half an hour when the heat between my legs stopped being a thought and became urgency. The concrete wall was cold; I was burning.

He doesn’t know that when he closes his chat window, I turn off the light and let my hands do what his hands could never do to me from so far away.

The rain was hitting the window and the house was silent. I had the whole afternoon to myself, and for the first time I decided to stop imagining it and feel it for real.

She imagined herself in the dark, with her robe open and unknown hands moving over her without asking permission. And for the first time, she didn’t want them to stop.

I had never seen her, I didn’t know her name, but that night her sentences touched me deeper than anyone had touched me in years. And I let them.

The hiss was coming from my parents’ room, and when I looked into the darkness I couldn’t move. Then my sister appeared at the other end of the hall.

I had finished all my work, no one was left on the floor, and the heat had me restless. That afternoon I decided to play with fire on the desk.

I had never dared watch myself while I touched myself. That afternoon I put my phone in front of the bed, took a deep breath, and learned something new about my own desire.

I never thought something as stupid as a comb could leave me trembling, alone in my room, biting my lip so I wouldn’t scream.

I thought it would just be another chat to kill the boredom. But when he started typing, I closed my eyes and let his words do what no hand had done in months.

There was no one home, no plans, and no excuse. Just me, the sofa facing the window, and the dangerous idea of leaving everything on display.

I thought I was alone at home. I left the bathroom door open, closed my eyes, and said her name out loud, never imagining she’d already come back.

We had been locked in the room all afternoon, and still he was awake in the bathroom. Curiosity beat sleep, and what I saw changed me.

She expected one toy. Inside the box was an entire collection, and Lucía knew that afternoon, alone in the apartment, no one would interrupt her.

The lock thrown, the light off, and one single finger enough to take me where no boy my age ever knew how to lead me.

Marina turned off the television to sleep. Then the sounds above her head began, and she knew that night she wouldn’t be getting any rest for a very different reason.