Desire

He never dressed up his love with pretty words. He showed it by choosing to be there, looking at me like someone studying a work of art, and telling me the truth without beating around the bush.

I always say I’m shy, but the truth is nothing turns me on more than the possibility that someone will open the door at the worst possible moment.

I told her yes because it turned me on more than it did her. What I didn’t plan on was falling asleep just when things were getting good.

She had spent eight comfortable, empty years of marriage when that man smiled at her between the aisles. She never imagined that smile would leave her without a husband, without a lover, and finally face to face with herself.

He was the last person I expected to see that afternoon. I opened the door half-asleep, and when I saw him standing there with that crooked smile, my mouth went dry.

She knew exactly what that dress would do; what she didn’t expect was for him to dare whisper it in her ear, right in front of the whole family.

Every time we went back to Grandma’s old house, the same game started all over again: one hand brushing another and nobody watching.

We’ve been together for years, and there’s still something I don’t dare ask her for. Every time she kneels in front of me, the fantasy returns and I struggle to stay silent.

I wore my cowgirl hat with no intention of going home alone. I never imagined a stranger would suggest something I’d never dared to try.

I thought I ruled the bedroom—untouchable, demanding. Then you went down on me and opened me up, and I found out how much I liked obeying.

When I opened the door wearing nothing but a towel, I never imagined my father’s friend would look at me like that—or that I’d look back without a trace of shame.

I found her crying in the kitchen, the phone still in her hand and her husband’s voice still echoing. I only meant to comfort her; I swear the rest wasn’t in my plans.

I never thought of myself as submissive, but the first time his voice ordered me over the phone, I obeyed without thinking. And I discovered being someone’s could feel better than I ever imagined.

For twenty years I pretended I was satisfied. The night I stopped, I discovered that an experienced woman can be far more frightening than a young girl.

From the monitor room I saw her open her jacket when she thought no one was looking. She had no idea her new guard had been watching her all morning.

I went downstairs thinking I was in control. Three hours later, I was just a spectator to something that no longer belonged to me.

I'm twenty-seven with an ordinary life, a loving family, and a secret I've finally dared to write down.

Some ask for photos before hello. Others call me things they never got permission to say. Here are the gems from my inbox, with the names changed.

The bathroom door was half open, steam drifting out, and she didn’t cover herself. She held my gaze as if she’d planned the whole scene for me.

I climbed the stairs with my heart pounding like a teenager’s. She was waiting upstairs, and I still didn’t know it would be the night she left me with nothing.